Oh i see you have some of my products,hehehe.
Oh i see you have some of my products,hehehe.
The dates shown were, of course, simply typos.
You both have it all wrong. After I get my millions, the first thing I'll do is start harvesting organs from third world street people to give me as much time as possible. It takes a lot of money to do that, so if time = happiness and money = time thru harvesting, then it stands to reason that money = happiness.
It's simple algebra.
It's simple daydreaming, that's what it is......
I'll get a few for you, too. What's your blood type?
Red........
My cousin Winona once wrote that on a questionnaire in her high school health class. And you wonder why some teachers drink, eh?
I actually don't know my blood type. I assume it's written on my medical notes....
I don't know mine, either. I think it is A-positive. But with that being said, I would probably write 'I dunno' on the questionnaire instead of 'red'... That still cracks me up.
Everywhere I go - shops, restaurants, internet - everyone wants me to complete a questionnaire, which may win me a cash prize.....
1. Which shops did you visit today?
2. What is the name of your favourite restaurant?
3. Which browser do you use?
Answer the above and you may win a cash prize.
Don't forget the 'call the number on your receipt within 24 hours and answer the short questionnaire to be registered for the chance to win a $500 shopping spree' promotion.
I'm saying nothing, and I bet that call number is premium rate.
And rarely do I hear who was a winner.....
The chances should be pretty good because I can't imagine too many people do it. I certainly cannot imagine myself doing it.
I think you may be underestimating the response to these surveys/questionnaires...
I quote you from a ticket that I'm looking at right now, passed to me by a team member on the visit to the supermarket just yesterday :
"Take part in our short survey and we'll give you 25 Clubcard points and enter you into a prize draw to win a £1000 Tesco gift card"......
See this is why you should always deal with who you know...[me]no surveys,no waste of your precious time,just tell me what you need and i'll have my crim..opps-err-ahem-hehe,associates get it for you.
I just have a feeling that your 'crim..opps-err-ahem-hehe,associates' would get it for me,whatever it was, and I would only have to ask.
Except that, most times, I wouldn't even have to ask, and I would still get it - and that would be whether I liked it or not......
West,i'm here to serve a mere serpent of the people,your wish is my command...[at only 1,000%above factory invoice]and my crim..opps-err-ahem-hehe cronies are all over the globe to steal...opps-err-ahem hehe..to secure whatever your heart desires.
I'd better double-lock the door.....
Haaaaaaaaaaaa,west you're a funny fellow.
Please ask your 'gentlemen' to leave any indications of good intentions under the doormat.
Until then, no-one at home.....
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...i 'm on the floor you're killin me over here,stop it...and they say the english have no sense of humor,west you're on your way,you're the next[stan laurel].
We do have a sense of humour. We sent you Bob Hope. He left because he knew we'd never make him King.
Thanks for the memories.
For those of you who still have them.....
Bob hope was the best[white]standup comedian of all time.
Bold statement. I loved Bob Hope, but Rodney Dangerfield changed the game for a great many comedians by introducing quirks into his act. Don Rickles absolutely defined insult comedy, well before Joan Rivers perfected it. Johnny Carson and Lenny Bruce had superb timing. Andy Kauffman could set up his closing joke with his first sentence. And Steve Martin and Robin Williams were hyper unique in their presentations.
If I had to choose from them, I'd give it to Steve Martin, who literally changed the game for a lot of folks. He was relatively unknown he started showing up on 'Saturday Night Live' with rabbit ears and a bent arrow going through his head. And then he perfected a tag-line for the ages. And if you don't agree with me, 'Well, excuuuuuuuuuse me!"
You're excused,the names you mentioned are legends of course,but for my money bob hope was...da man!!
He had supreme timing on stage and film. That's the most important factor to being a great comedian. He could open or narrow his eyes just a little to convey his thought and crack me up. And didn't it seem like he always had a semi-smile that put your mind to want to laugh, even when he was setting up the joke? I'll never forget the first time I saw 'The Lemon Drop Kid' as a boy. He was a true legend of comedy.
Another gift from us in the UK, to you in the US.
In return, I enjoyed Jack Benny and Jonathan Winters....
I didn't know that he was a citizen of the UK until this post. You learn something new everyday. Well, I do, anyway.
So do I. Yesterday, I didn't know that you didn't know that Bob Hope was born on this side of the Atlantic.
So that's double proof of it's not where you start, it's where you finish.
That's true. In the past, I have had trouble finishing thi
Lost for words....
And with that, I'm opening my book to add a few. It's time.
Two important words : The End. Then work it back from there....
It takes a little more than that, I'm afraid. I'm handling it like I do when I draw a figure. First a stick man, followed by boxes and circles for weight. Then clothes, folds and wrinkles, shadow, and detail. Writing without structure takes forever and leads to an ugly, unrealistic story. It will probably be ugly and unrealistic anyway, but not because I didn't approach it correctly.
You could be getting just a bit hidebound there, Jerry, on being 'correct'.
It won't be anything until first you do write something, and continue with it. It will almost certainly be edited by yourself at some point.
If it's difficult to get going, just make points [[it's easier on paper) of key words, any key words, which spring to mind. Each one is likely to bring more. Keep a notebook with you at all times.
Consider what you have recently written on this forum, very often making a response on something you were not anticipating, and posted it quickly and composed well. Then multiply it...and that is a most realistic potential for you.
You miss my point. Here's how I sketch while writing:
The story - A man walks to the mailbox to pick up a letter.
The plot points - He must take note of his surroundings, navigate through his neighborhood, consider what he's doing, and after reaching the mailbox, retrieve his parcel.
Story elements - His name is Bob Hardy, he lives on Elm Street, he lives in Baymont, and the mailbox is on Tarlton Ave.
Delineation - Bob Hardy opened the door and looked outside, his heart pumping excitedly. His journey would be brief, but he knew that what he found at the end could change his life in many ways. For better or worse. But for a man in a rut, any change would be welcome and he sought it without pause.
He stepped through the door and onto his porch to find a beautiful, if unspectacular spring day greeted him. The air was warm and the sky, although partially cloudy, was an encouraging shade of blue. In the distance, he heard children playing and birds singing songs of the season. Fantastic, he thought. This could be my day.
And with that final consideration, he stepped from the porch, walked down his sidewalk to the little gate at the end, and opened it. It creaked a little when he swung it toward himself; the sound was old and somewhat irritating and seemed out of place with everything else that he was experiencing. Whereas he normally associated that sound with the state of his existence - a sound of age and decay, needing but never receiving necessary maintenance - today, it was just one of the many things in the periphery of what would be a special day.
__________________________________________________ ___________________
So, my point is that I approach the writing after knowing certain things so that I'm not coming up with plot and major points as a result of typing. That stuff is already worked out. I know where the story is going, how it will get there, and how it will conclude. I will write, rewrite, and re-rewrite the details [[all the while checking for appropriate grammar and tone) over the next few or many months. Failing to do that is why I've always stalled in the past, so I'm confident I'll have something worth reading [[to me, at least) this time at the end of the process.
Last edited by Jerry Oz; 02-07-2015 at 02:42 PM.
No, I don't think I have missed your point [[I rarely do, although I understand it may well seem so), but perhaps have just skipped ahead a bit. You could well find that your original plot and major points develop a momentum of their own which leave even you thinking "hmmmmm...".., although that won't happen until you have undertaken the initial typing.
Yes, agreed, you do have to keep going with the output, and not be erratic. Otherwise, it's a dream inside your head. Best to have a daily target of words...even if, after reading it back, it resembles porridge!
It sounds good so far, though I wouldn't want to read too much more text to find out what happened next with Bob Hardy, and, more interestingly, just why it is going to be a special day for him.
You're giving a methodical, chronological account of his actions, which of course is fine, but the reader might naturally take some of it 'as read', or 'goes without saying'. Implicit. [[e.g. I don't need to tell you I just opened up this computer to post these words to you....unless....it is essential to the plot of anything I was composing...which may well be your initial intention) .
It would be more concise [[and which, again, may well indeed be your intention) to start with 'Bob Hardy opened the door..' [[or similar) and then insert essential details from 'the story', 'the plot points' and 'story elements' into the text which follows, deleting any extraneous words.
Just saying, from the point of view of 'the reader'.
Write one piece of work which is enjoyed by others, and the thought that you are composing more will certainly keep up their interest...LOL
Ummm... You know that's not my story, right? It's just an example of how I start with a framework and add layers to it to create the story. The story that I'd write following 'Bob Hardy's Big Day' would be 'Jerry Oz Eats A Bullet'.
The progression would still be broadly similar.
I must say I could more readily identify with 'Bob Hardy's Big Day' than 'Jerry Oz Eats A Bullet'...LOL
Me too. Boy, the end of that book would really be 'the end'.
Well, y'know, I've been thinking about that in the kitchen, while making my own dinner tonight [[as well as stirring the pot right here, of course...)
Just suppose Bob Hardy's Big Day had the potential of being as horrific to others, as it was special to him. Suppose, while everything outwardly appeared calm and idyllic, he walked through the creaking gate, intent on committing a massacre...
I like it when film directors take you one direction before totally pulling the rug out from underneath you with a revelation. You have to be careful to set something up like that or it becomes cheesy. And the big problem with movie trailers is that they too often reveal the surprise at the expense of it blowing the viewer away. I'll bet directors hate that.
Once upon a time....darn it!!!!
Yes, agreed, the trailing of movies is so fast and frentic, you feel you've seen it before you actually do - if indeed, that actually happens.
The most successful way to deal with the public is to enourage them all the way to feel it is they who are making the decisions, and are working at their own pace with the project being presented to them - in other words, they have to feel drawn in, and feel a need to 'stay tuned', at least for half the running length.
Hitting them over the heads with loud clips must lose a lot of possible interest from potential punters, before many are even aware of it. Recommendation of a movie is most effective, but also slower in practice to get a response.
A lot of movies know they won't get word of mouth, so they put as many butts in the seats on opening night as possible. And I hate movies that confuse sudden loud noises with being scary. It's not scaring the viewers if you have a cat jump from behind a trash can screaming like a banshee during a quiet scene. It's insulting them.
On the flip side, every once and again, a main character gets killed halfway into the movie and it makes you wonder who the protagonist actually is if anybody can die. Those tend to grab my attention, at least for the rest of the way if not up until that point. That happened in 'To Live and Die In LA' and 'Friday the 13th'.
Hey jerry if you find out let me know.
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