Originally Posted by
juicefree20
Roberta:
I don't know how long you've been a member here, perhaps you've been here before, or have lurked for awhile.
Me, I'm going on 7 years here & I've seen folks come, seen folks go & have had my share of disagreements wtih various folks for reasons similar to this, about common decency & respect. To me, it simply comes back to the matter of the same old arguments being endlessly replayed. Arguments, which didn't originate here.
As I said, I don't know TopDiva, don't know Tony Turner, don't know who's who, who's here under a new name & save one, have never met any of the usual participants. What I do know is that the 3 or 4 years of nonsensical fights that INNOCENT forumers have had to wade through , having had their threads demolished, CAN BE avoided. They're UNNECESSARY & it's more about people & their own egos. At this point, it's not so much about their love for their favorite Supreme[[s), but more about their intense dislike for ONE ANOTHER. And once again trampling over all that's decent, this behavior played itself out here recently in a memorial thread for Gladys Horton.
When people are so myopic that they can't reign themselves in & show just a little respect in a memorial thread, then to me they're no better than the "liars" whom they're against. After all, if they can point out how the other party is so crass & undignified as to misbehave, then it means that obviously knowing better, they should hold themselves to a higher standard than they would persons whom they regard as common "trash".
Let's be truthful, in the brick & mortar world, do you honestly believe that any of this would be playing out as it does here? In the real world, this wouldn't be happening because someone would've gotten beat-down or killed by now. No one would tolerate this nonsense on a daily basis & inevitably, someone would get hurt. That's the real world. In the real world, no one's going to go at one another as they feel free to do here. For 5 YEARS OR MORE??
The truth is that this has been going on for quite awhile, both sides gives as good as they take & I've come to the conclusion that some actually enjoy beating up on one another. I may be wrong, but it sure appears as that's how it is. Why would anyone expend so much energy going at one another for any prolonged period of time unless they felt as though they were getting something out of doing so?
Most of us are quick to point out what others have done wrong, while somehow overlooking our own contributions. If we're to be truthfull, then we can't say that we're helping cool things down if we follow someone into a thread, then call them a liar or ask them a provocative question which alludes to a lie that they told, in a thread that has nothing to do with that lie.
But just the other day, you did just that to TopDiva. And you did so on a few other occasions as well. It was already established that TopDiva had been caught in a lie, it was stated, restated & people had every right to say whatever they said about it & you'll notice that where before I offered a benefit of the doubt, once you guys got on his/her case, I said nothing further about it. He eventually apologized & I moved on.
You had to know that by calling him out in a different thread & alluding to his "ruse", that you'd receive a negative response in return, thus escalating hostilities. When you do that, you can't sit back speaking about an "attack" because you did something to provoke the attack. I don't condone what he/she did, especially the "trickery" part. But I can't hold him more acountable for his wrongs, than I would that of others.
Lying is wrong, but provocation is wrong as well. You can't toss a rock at someone, then complain about being attacked. I've been reading most of what's been going on, even read some before it was deleted & the blame for all of this is shared by both sides of the fence. And whatever hasn't been deleted from threads or from the archives will certainly prove that.
Bookmarks