I've decided that westgrand can be my agent. You'll have to go through him..........
I've decided that westgrand can be my agent. You'll have to go through him..........
Ms. Moe will have an interest only in any forthcoming projects which are fully commensurate with her talents.
West,you can't represent moe cause you're in the movie too,conflint of uninterested[it's in your contract]as for your talents all you gotta do is look at the camera while you're falling,and don't adlib just hit the ground[splatt]and don't jump up just lay there until i say cut.
I'm not in the movie because I can't be the monster, which is fine, because now I can start acting like one...
I've signed no contract, and neither will my client [[the aforesaid Ms. Moe), until I have run my eyes over it at my leisure, as well as a scanner to carefully study all that extremely small print.....
And please check for invisible ink!
You can now see how diligent I must be, in the handling of Ms. Moe's affairs.....
You sure that monster isn't YOU?
All agents are monsters
But you have my best interests at heart!!!
There are lovable monsters, and there are evil monsters.
Encountered in some situations, each could pass for the other.
Since I want the best for you, I guess I must be generally decent and fair, if not perhaps totally lovable LOL!
If you two can get over this[lovefest]i got a picture to cast,moe you're in,west you're in....now where's[big duufuss]i told him to be here for casting.
Who is big duufuss?
. Perhaps we should try consulting 'Who's Who, in Show Business' - ?
How can R&B direct the movie now that Moe has got a restraining order against him?
Ahem. This is Ms. Moe's agent speaking, once again.
The director of the movie - the legendary Mr. Cecil B. de Arr&bee, of Soulful Detroit - has had a re-training order imposed on him.
My client, Ms. Moe and myself, have a great understanding of Mr de Arr&bee's directing skills, and his inimitable ability to negotiate with the studio heads.
We are certain that the principal players in all of his many projects, including the very few others in the industry who are equal to the stature of Ms. Moe, will have seen him regularly fired with enthusiasm.
Good just isn't the word for Mr. de Arr&bee.
You are correct. Good just isn't the word for Mr deArr&bee. I haven't seen him regularly fired with enthusiasm, but I have regularly seen him fired.
It has happened so many times, it has led to the popular phrase "You GO!!!!!"
It's very hard to find an adequate adjective for R&B.
Yes, it's more of a feeling. A sense of impending doom....
...like in a cartoon when a character runs over the edge of a cliff and is frozen in mid-air until he looks down; then comes the inevitable fall.
With Arr&bee, it has more to do with "Which way will he jump?"
Wonder if he uses "ACME"
MOE,WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR A...RE-TRAINING ORDER,BIG DUUFUSS WORKS FOR ME..[well he did before he threw that dog off the top of the Washington monument]HECK I TOLD THAT FOOL THAT THE DOG WAS IN WITNESS PROTECTION AND NOT TO TOUCH HIM,BIG DUUFUSS DIDN'T LISTEN AND I FIRED HIM,HE'S GOOD AT THROWING FOLKS OFF THINGS SO HE'S THE MONSTER...DON'T WORRY MOE AS LONG AS I FEED HIM HE'LL BEHAVE.
That's your problem R&B, not ours. Let's take a LONG break westgrand...
NOW MOE,BE GOOD...[look you'll get your own dressing room I found nice used trailer].
I bet it is still possible to read 'Barnum & Bailey' on the side....
I tried to have the sides cleaned; lo and behold you are right!!! Barnum & Bailey with a clown on one side & an elephant on the other. I am not amused R&B.
I think the Big Top is about to go up....
I will accept no less than a trailer exactly like Will Smith's.
WILL SMITH,THAT HAM ACTOR,LOOK MOE I'M DOING SERIOUS WORK HERE AND YOU'RE GONNA BE A PART OF THE BIGGEST FLOP...OPPS-ERR-AHME HEHE...THE BIGGEST FILM SINCE[THE MUPPETT MOVIE]AFTER THIS OFFERS ARE GONNA COME FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD...[oh and by the way,about that trailer the guy I won it from it that crap game promised he'd paint it,i'll sue him]MOE YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY.
Right..........Mr. Westgrand, ESQ. , and I are on our way to Will Smith's trailer.
That's the only way we're going.
Wagons roll!
Oh, this is more than a "wagon" westgrand. It can tie up a city block!
A football pitch, on wheels?
Something like that.............and two levels!
Not unlike a shopping precinct, then......
and to think I coulda had whoopee Goldberg.....OH ARE WE BACK LIVE,PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT GRAFFITI SOMEONE SCAWLED THERE,I'M AFRAID YOU WON'T BE RIDING WITH WILL SMITH,IF YOU READ THE SMALL PRINT[I'LL WAIT WHILE YOU FIND A MAGNIFYING GLASS]NOW IT SAYS ON PAGE 999 THAT YOU'RE SIGNED TO[R&B PRODUCTIONS]FOR THE DURATION OR A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN-WHICHEVER COMES FIRST,SO NO MORE HOLDUPS...BIG DUUFUS IS IN COSTUME ALREADY.
Go find your Whoopi!! I signed nothing..........
Ahem. This is Ms. Moe's agent speaking.
She signed nothing. Ms. Moe has been working voluntarily, free, gratis....so you can kiss her Astrakhan coat.
Please direct us to the door marked 'Exit'......
MOE YOU BEEN HANGIN WITH WEST TOO MUCH...[look I know you didn't actually sign but let's just go on good faith til the film is in the can???]I'LL SHARE THE PRIOFITS WITH ALL INVOLVED,MOE YOU'RE GETTING IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR.
My agent, Mr. Westgrand ESQ, and I want the penthouse so no deal.
We're talking ELEVATOR here.....as in, going up in the world, and at a great speed.....
Express..........
I just had a phone call from Paramount Motion Pictures Group.
They have some interesting offers for you, Moe....
Arr&bee has lost his dolly grip.
And his Best Boy....
DON'T WORRY MOE,WHEN I GET BACK TO DA HOOD I'LL GET YOU A SMALL PART[no speaking parts]IN MY NEXT PRODUCTION,BUT LOST THAT EGOMANIACAL AGENT.
Ahem. This is Ms. Moe's agent speaking.
I shall await instructions from my client.
I'm her last chance at stardum,moe get down to da hood and get in line.
She's already in line for an Oscar, in her forthcoming production "Little Red Riding da Hood".
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