By the time you read this....??

[arr&bee]

Well today is a holiday so ain't much happenin here,now we know it's a holiday here but maybe someplace else too? Heck some other country could have something going on just like we do well maybe not just like but something anyhow i know most are cooking on the ol grill which is just like cookin on a new grill except the food tastes newer,but if you got an old grill don't worry you can still burn up stuff same as with a new grill know what i mean...of course you don't cause you ain't paying attention yet and it don't matter anyhow because by the time you read this it will be the next day and all the food will have been eaten already..[coulda saved me a burger]you all think i'm just ramblin on because i'm sitting here on this computer with nothing else to do except ramble on well maybe i do and maybe i don't that ain't none of your buiswacks anyhow so just stay with the subject matter at hand, don't look at me like that you just stay on point now the point being is that i'm sending out a sort of greeting yeah that's what it is to all of you reading this...[what do you mean you ain't reading this??]as i was saying well i'm not repeating what i was saying because i forgot and don't you worry about it anyhow because you should be reading this stuff anyhow and then you would know what i mean so now that i've cleared that up we can get back to the subject at hand which is the holiday which is where i came in..[you paying attention??]like i said all along is that somewhere someone or something is having a day like today just like it is here which is what i've been saying all along if you take the time to read what's written right here in front of you,but it don't matter because it will be the next day when you see this anyhow and you won't have a glue as to what i'm talking about,of course if any of you are reading this then you're nuttier than me because you should be outside cooking on the grill,heheheheheh...happy forth!!!

[soulster]

Sounds like someone stole Jai's hooch this morning.

[Jerry Oz]

I feel sleep in the fourth chapter of that post. On Monday, I'll pick up where I left off.

Can't wait to see how it ends...

[arr&bee]

Jerry,there's a quiz later.

[westgrandboulevard]

I have a feeling we may be working in the dark here.

Can someone tell me where the emergency exits are located?

[arr&bee]

There're closed.

[westgrandboulevard]

Along with the restrooms, and the windows, I suppose.

This audience is already captivated.....

[arr&bee]

After a sip of this wonderful elixur,you kidneys dry up you can close the restroom,and put a closet there,hehehe.

[Jerry Oz]

Wait, what? A quiz?! If it's not written in Ebonics, I'm suing for discrimination.

[soulster]

Wait, what? A quiz?! If it's not written in Ebonics, I'm suing for discrimination.

Donald Trump lobbied to keep the Spanglish version off the shelves.

[moe]

Hello detox? I think we have a problem here. Come right now.......

[Jerry Oz]

I saw where hooch was hitting the inner cities hard but had no idea how bad the problem was until this post...

[arr&bee]

WAIT A JUST A HOOCH SIPPIN MINUTE HERE,UMM JERRY WAHT DO YOU MEAN THAT HOOCH IS IN THE INNER CITY...[we have an inner city???]NO WONDER MY CASH FLOW HAS BEEN LATE,I'M DOWN HERE IN DA HOOD AND THERE'S AN[INNER CITY OUTHTHERE SOMEWHERE WITH MY MONEY...OK JERRY GET DOWN THERE AND FIND OUT WHO'S RIPPIN ME OFF...[HOW ABOUT THAT-THE INNER CITY...WHO KNEW????}

[westgrandboulevard]

I wish I'd brought some cookies.

[arr&bee]

Me too,i'm hungry.

[westgrandboulevard]

I'll call someone and get them to push some under the door.

Err.....as we're all sat here, let's take stock.

There's a quiz later.
The doors are locked.
Moe has called the detox people....and we're getting hungry.

Remind me again. What are we waiting for?

[arr&bee]

Haaaaaaaaaaaaa,west we're just one big disfunsional family...what time are those detox folks coming i need my meds.

[Jerry Oz]

They tried to make me go to rehab. But I said 'no, no, no!'

[westgrandboulevard]

I'm so hungry, if they provide cookies in rehab, then I say 'yes, yes, yes!'....

[Jerry Oz]

Call Greasy Grady. He delivers.

[arr&bee]

Yeah he delivers...but he's got overhead and for what he will charge will be way over your head.

[Jerry Oz]

A good meal will stay on your mind long after you've eaten it and a dinner from Greasy Grady is the gift that keeps on giving. You get more than you pay for the meal. I paid $10 for an order of barbecue ribs but also wound up with botulism, high blood pressure, dry heaves, and night sweats.

[westgrandboulevard]

The servers dressed as medical staff should have given you a clue....

[moe]

Especially with their "bedside manner."

[Jerry Oz]

I should have known there was a problem when they made me sign a form that waived all legal responsibility for serving me my meal instead of simply giving me a receipt.

[arr&bee]

You gotta line your stomach with this wonderful elixur[it's the only known cure]jerry,you lucky cause greasy grady just got for that case of[bubonic ]he's so slick that he wanted to bring the black plegue back to da hood.

[Jerry Oz]

He's not a bad guy but his joint ain't exactly the cleanest in the hood. I once asked a waitress what a fly was doing in my glass of water and she replied: "Looks like the backstroke to me."

[arr&bee]

Yep,like the time a customer asked him why the hamburger rolls had moving things on top,his answer..dancing seseme seeds.

[Jerry Oz]

Or when he put blue cheese on my salad when I asked for cheddar. 'That is cheddar', he said. What an innovator! Blue [[or rather green) cheddar cheese...

[arr&bee]

Or like the time he served[fresh???]salad with little yellow flowers,well the flowers were from the dandalions he [borrowed???]from someone's yard.

[Jerry Oz]

Or the time I asked him when he started serving escargot and if the snails should still be moving on my plate. He didn't know about any snails but said that he'd have to charge extra if I ate them.

[arr&bee]

Haaaaaaaaa,that greasy grady is a hoot..like the time the health department was gonna close him down for having roaches, and he said that they were paid to watch the place.

[Jerry Oz]

I shoulda known to avoid him when I went to his web page and got a virus before I got one from eating his food.

[arr&bee]

Hey jerry,he charges extra for viruses.

[Jerry Oz]

As I found out. The only way that I got away with not paying it was because they needed to check my stool to detect the virus and I didn't poop for a month after eating 'Greasy Grady's Signature Mac 'n Cheese'. He's the only restaurateur who uses government cheese in his dishes.

[arr&bee]

I knew shady grady was crooked when he would pass out[barf bags]after every meal,of course he'd charge you for em.

[arr&bee]

i knew shady grady was crooked when he would pass out[barf bags]after every meal,of course he'd charge you for em.

opps did i say[shady]that's his father and another story..i meant greasy!!

[Jerry Oz]

I knew Shady! He wasn't very bright.

[arr&bee]

That's why he worked at night to put little greasy through cooking school[sniff,sniff]kinda gets you in the heart.

[Jerry Oz]

It got me in the heart, to be sure. I required triple bypass surgery to get over eating a plate of Greasy Grady's chittlins.

[arr&bee]

Umm jerry i kinda hate to be the one to tell you this but...buzzards don't have chittlins.

[Jerry Oz]

Well they were good, whatever they were. Vinegar, hot sauce, salt and pepper [[not to mention cornbread) and there you go. Guts is guts.

[arr&bee]

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa,and it guts to eat at greasy grady's...in more ways than one...once there were some ants in his kitchen,when conplained he said...shhhh i had to hire em after the roaches quit.

[Jerry Oz]

Grady used roaches like miners use canaries. When they stop running around, he knows the hog maws are done.

[arr&bee]

Once greasy grady served some[pigs feet]and when the customer complained that the feet were still moving greasy told em to shut up be greatful he wasn't charging em for the live entertainment.

[westgrandboulevard]

That must be the same customer who complained his coffee tasted like mud.

Greasy Grady said "Of course it does. It was ground this morning!"

[Jerry Oz]

Grady is a hoot. A customer once asked him for a refund and he responded by giving her a quiz.
"What's left when you take the 'ice' it of 'ice cream'?" he asked.
"Cream?" she responded.
"Yes! Good answer!" Grady replied. "And what do you get by taking the 'water' out of 'watermelon'?"
"Melon..." she replied. "I think."
"Exactly! Melon! You're great at this!" Grady exhorted.
"Last question: What do you have when the 'stink' has been taken out of refund?"
She considered it for a moment. "Well, there's no 'stink' in refund", she said.
"Damn right, you are!" Grady shouted at her. "There is no stinkin' refund so get out of here before I have you tossed out."

[arr&bee]

Greasy is the only diner whose foods are banned in all fourty eight states and alaska and 99 countries around the world,legend has it that way back when greasy grady was starting out the pope of notre dame visited while passing through the hood on tour,well he made the mistake of actually eating something and by the time he returned to his land his back was hunched and for the rest of his days he lived in the bell tower..toiling as...the hunchback of notre dame.

[Jerry Oz]

That's sad. I heard about someone else from the same place who got the runs after Grady's vegetable soup. When he got back, they couldn't cure the diarrhea and he's now called the running back of Notre Dame.

[moe]

.........and running straight into my office!