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  1. #3051
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    HEY RALPH,IF IT WASN'T FOR MY TIMELY AND USELESS COMMENTARIES THIS POST WOULD ACTUALLY MAKE SENSE,WHERE'S THE FUN IN THAT...MOE,WEST,JERRY,144MAN ARE VERY SCHOLERLY INTELLEGENT FOLKS CAPABLE OF DISCUSSING THE MOST IMPORTANT MATTERS AND WORLD EVENTS...B-O-R-I-N-G[HEHEHE]I'M BREAKING INTO MOTION PICTURES...[so far I've gotten past the security guard at the gates]I'M GONNA BE BIG AND MY NAME WILL BE UP IN LIGHTS..[as soon as I find the switch]AND I'M TRYING TO BAMBOOZLE..OPPS-ERR-AHEM-HEHE...BRING MOE ALONG AND MAKE HER AN ACESSESORY-OPPS-ERR-AHEM-HEHE..AN UP AND COMING NEW FACE ON THE SCREEN,BUT SHE'S UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THAT HONEST BRITISH INTELECTUAL WEST AND I CAN'T GET MY CLAWS-OPPS-ERR-AHEM-HEHE..MY CONTRACT NEAR HER...NOW JERRY YOU TELL GREASY GRAYSEE THAT HIS MONEY IS ON THE WAY,IF NOT GO IN BACK AND YOU'LL FIND A UNICYCLE PARKED WITH YOUR NAME ON IT.

  2. #3052
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    Nah, I'm good. The last unicycle that I rode had a mousetrap on the seat. It got me and it's impossible to ride a unicycle on your left butt cheek only. See if you can get me a skateboard instead.

  3. #3053
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    Aug 2010
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    Better still, send him a 3d printer, and he can copy as many skateboards as he likes.

  4. #3054
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    144man,i got a part for you in my next classic you'll win a[golden turkey]for this part..now get down to the alley and ask for...paperman..he has your lines.

  5. #3055
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    No he doesn't. I just saw paperman and he was busted for doing lines in the alley.

  6. #3056
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    Opps-err-ahem-hehe[darn paperman]i told him not to drink during the filming,ok go down to the end of the alley and ask for pencilthin.

  7. #3057
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    Feb 2012
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    I met with pencilthin, and his name is well earned. He stuck out his tongue and turned to the side and I swore I was looking at a zipper.

  8. #3058
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    He must have put on weight. Back in the day when he turned sideways he used to disappear.

  9. #3059
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    And before that, he had to run around in the shower to get wet.

  10. #3060
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    Pencilman got into my[lead]stash.

  11. #3061
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    That sounds about right; the coward. He was always a little yellow.

  12. #3062
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    Yes, he was known to sing like a canary.

  13. #3063
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    Like a canary with a sore throat and pitch control issues. He once asked me if he could sing solo. I thanked him if he could sing so low that I wouldn't have to hear him.

  14. #3064
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    HEY JERRY WHERE YA AT???I SENT THE DUDE ON A MISSION AND HE AIN'T BEEN SEEN SINCE...[I think he missed the boat].

  15. #3065
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    He was last seen heading in the direction of Wayward Pines.

  16. #3066
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    Feb 2012
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    What a day! I arrived in London months ago but my tablet died and I forgot my cord, so I couldn't post. Also, I don't have a cell phone [[they're listening... you knew that, didn't you?) so I couldn't get on SDF Clubhouse until I made a friend who was kind enough to let me use his laptop. That never happened. Apparently, Brits don't take kindly to Americans who use phrases like 'pip-pip', 'bloody good', and 'cheerio'. And I thought that I knew how to speak English.

    Thankfully, 'Alvin' saw me panhandling and gave me a job as a cage dancer in a go-go bar. My bikini is a little tight, but the tips were good. I now have enough pounds to rent a computer for a week and file this report.

  17. #3067
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    Keep up the good work,those bikinis tend to ride up abit in the back,as soon as i' get out..opps-err-ahem-hehe..as soon as i get back to the office,i'll mail you a shirt and pants.

  18. #3068
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    Feb 2012
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    Great! I sold my clothes for a handful of ones and gave them to somebody that I asked to use them in order to tip me. I wasn't making much and thought I'd remind the patrons that I was there professionally. The guy that I gave the loot to took off and now I'm broke and indecently attired.
    Last edited by Jerry Oz; 06-01-2015 at 10:40 PM.

  19. #3069
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    I gotcha,a pair of bellbottoms and a loud print shirt are on the way,i didn't forget those ten inch platforms that you like either.

  20. #3070
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    Feb 2012
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    I'm into nine inch platforms these days. The kids will laugh at me if I was ten inch shoes.

  21. #3071
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    Ok,i'll have my guy[hacksaw]hack off an inch,gotta keep the kids happy.

  22. #3072
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    By popular demand this post is back where it belongs..hehehehehehe!!!

  23. #3073
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    Well, it's not snowing but we've had 20 straight days with rain. Happy happy, joy joy.

  24. #3074
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    Hey jerry,swing that ark by here and pick me up.

  25. #3075
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    If the ark does stop to let you on, then there would have to be two of you....a prospect that would fill the rest of us with dread....

  26. #3076
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    Jan 2014
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    Haaaaaaaaaaaaaa,west other than my crim-opps-err-ahem-hehe..my business associates there's nobody else and we'll only need a small portion of the ark to run our scams-opps-err-ahem-hehe..our enterprises,can't let a little rain stand in the way of suckers-opps-err-ahem-hehe..the people getting these good deals.

  27. #3077
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    Feb 2012
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    Just me and the girl of my dreams in my ark. Sorry, fellas.

  28. #3078
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    That's OK. Walking on water is not a problem for me...

  29. #3079
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    Girl of your dreams???jerry i got money to make now dump the chick and my boys will be waitin down at the dock of the bay...west stay away from the water.

  30. #3080
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    Dump the chick??? I feel Mrs Oz will certainly have something to say about that, be it a reference to her or, even worse, A.N.Other.

    I'm in my element on the surface of water - unlike you, who very often seems to be in deep water...

  31. #3081
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    Who's in deep water?..i never touch the stuff.

  32. #3082
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    Well, I figured that is only need an ark if I no longer needed Mrs. Oz, so she wasn't the girl I was referring to. But I guess she should have been. Especially since she reads my SDF posts when I forget to choose the page...

  33. #3083
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    Introducing Mrs. Oz, our very own Sixth Censor, in charge of the SDF Quality Control department!

  34. #3084
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    Opps,hey jerry go down to da hood and ask for lookout smitty he'll hide you til this blows over.

  35. #3085
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    Blow over? Do you think it will? After 23 years?

  36. #3086
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    Ah. Words spoken by a voice of reason, facing into a swirling vocal current of distraction!

  37. #3087
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    West leave voice out of this.

  38. #3088
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    Impossible. Voice is in everything.

  39. #3089
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    Are we talking about Mariah Carey? Nevermind. Thought you said it was everywhere...

  40. #3090
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    Voice is everywhere...just not anywhere, all the time.....

  41. #3091
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    Quote Originally Posted by westgrandboulevard View Post
    That's OK. Walking on water is not a problem for me...
    I can do that as long as it's frozen.

  42. #3092
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    Aug 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by westgrandboulevard View Post
    Voice is everywhere...just not anywhere, all the time.....
    With R&B there's also an invoice everywhere.

  43. #3093
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    Jan 2014
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    Hello all this is the voice of reason, some think of me as Jai's alter ego, i assure you I am not, I was assigned to keep him out of trouble but he never listens so his doctors said to give him some space,so I do. Jai won't stop making that poisonous hooch of his and flolks won't stop drinking it, the other day a neighbor spilled some on his lawn and now he can't grow dirt,Jai is out of control, but he likes the folks here thank goodness.

  44. #3094
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    That's funny that the neighbor can't grow dirt. I gave a shot to a friend of mine and the next day, that's all that remained of him.

  45. #3095
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    Thanks west,you had to bring that do gooder into the fray...[he's texting me about behaving]this from a guy who never smiles.

  46. #3096
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    Smiling is overrated. I stopped doing it years ago and I'm better for it.

  47. #3097
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    Jerry the reason you don't smile is because the bank refused payment on that loan i gave you...i told you to go down to slick slim in da hood and he would take care of you.

  48. #3098
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    Slick Slim will have taken care of many people who have suddenly disappeared, and in mysterious circumstances.

  49. #3099
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    All I know it's that Slick Slim had a Slim Jim and he stole my car while I was waiting for him.

  50. #3100
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    That's why you stay in your car and keep the engine runnin.

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