Let it snow,let it snow,let it snow

**Jerry Oz** · 07-20-2014, 08:45 PM

I submit that we know each other better than many of our family and friends do. For proof, consider that we're capable of saying things to each other that we'd never say to them. Consequently, it's not an imitation of life but a revelation of life that we see here.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-21-2014, 05:17 AM

I can't see anyone here, or really 'know' them so, to me, it doesn't seem such a complete reality.

But it does allow me to express myself, as me...and that indeed makes it a reality as an extension of the real me....and a very creative one, with untold options...which is very positive, and very beneficial.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-21-2014, 04:07 PM

In the end, nobody knows who we really are. I doubt that we even see ourselves in a true light, since nobody is the villain in his own book...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-21-2014, 04:41 PM

Although I've done a lot of introspection on those lines in my time, it isn't really helpful to consider that others may see us in a less favourable light than we envisage ourselves.

If anything, the opposite is true, as I now tend to feel disconcerted if someone makes it clear that I'm more than just OK in their book.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-21-2014, 05:03 PM

Hmmmm... I was thinking that people tend to see us in a more positive light than they probably should but you discerned them to have a more negative perspective. I agree that it doesn't matter [[unless they are in position to affect our job or living statuses), but it's interesting that our views on how they might see us differs.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-21-2014, 05:14 PM

I was thinking that they may see us to be good, as much as bad, but still just best not to dwell too long on which of the two it is.

When someone regards me or you, their assessment of us, good or bad, is probably and simply very much influenced by how they view themselves at that time.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-21-2014, 06:05 PM

"Projection". That's a tricky little psychological reality. Ten people can look at the same person and form ten different instant opinions of who that person is based upon her clothes, expression, posture, hair color/style, or makeup. Chances are very good that none of their assumptions accurately reflect her, but to them, she is forever who she was thought to be at first glance. And typically, those perceived attributes are reflective upon the person assigning them more that the person being assessed.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-21-2014, 06:20 PM

We only see what we want to see.

When we become obliged to see it differently, it hurts.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-21-2014, 07:27 PM

But why do many get upset with the person shining the light on their shortcomings instead of realizing that they need to change or accept it? The truth is what it is, so I don't understand why revelation makes the person who revealed it the enemy.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-22-2014, 06:53 AM

I think there's an element of "that's for me to know, and for you to find out".....and people can become annoyed when it is made plain that the truth is obvious to others, no matter how hard the attempt to conceal it.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-22-2014, 12:10 PM

Good point. I think that there's also an element of self-deception, wherein the person rationalized the behavior to mitigate how wrong it was. For example, what if I only said something deceptive to a friend because it would upset him to find out that I was sleeping with his girlfriend. Since it was a brief affair and now has ended, there's nothing productive to be made of telling him the truth, so if I don't confess when we talk about her, it's for his benefit. Therefore, what might be considered a lie is really not so bad because my intentions were just.

Of course, when he inevitably finds out and he confronts me, I'll have every excuse in the book about what I did and why I couldn't tell the truth. Those excuses will include trying to protect him in addition to his complicating my life by failing to pay proper attention to his girlfriend. As I get defensive, I'll do my damnedest [[first time I actually saw that word spelled out...) to make him and her to be the villains and me to be the victim. I'm only human, after all, and that is what we do when we get caught.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-22-2014, 12:14 PM

Tricky! Perhaps it's a matter of what would cause you the most stress : telling him about it, or waiting until he gets to know of it.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-22-2014, 12:21 PM

Or - God forbid - being a true friend and avoiding the situation altogether. Of course, if you were to tell him that something nearly happened, he'll confront her and it'll be Percy Sledge singing in the soundtrack of your life about what happens when a man loves a woman. "Sorry, Dawg. Cindy told me that you pushed up on her. I can't hang with a backstabber any more."

Forget the fact that you're the one who told him about it first...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-22-2014, 12:43 PM

You could cling to the hope that he'll not think much of her for betraying him in favour of you...and come and thank you later for alerting him to what she was really like....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-22-2014, 02:05 PM

There's always hope. But it seems that once the bond of friendship is broken, it is never restored quite so strong. One person might resent the other because he has to swallow his pride, become humble, and admit that he was wrong. Or the other one might hold on to the bitter words that were expressed before the breakup, regardless of how humble his friend now purports to be. The dynamics of friendship are complex and they can be irreparably altered by the smallest things.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-22-2014, 05:03 PM

It took me quite a while to notice that friendships are based, at least to some degree, on a keen sense of competition.

Everyone wants to feel they have people around who they feel they can trust, but they also want to present themselves to best effect. The conflict between the two leads to tensions, but I suppose we're all selling something....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-22-2014, 06:08 PM

Keen observations. Would you define the strength of friendship to be based upon what someone would do for you or based upon what you're willing to do for them?

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-23-2014, 06:33 AM

Friendship is about how I define the needs of someone I like, and how I could support those needs if asked.....and sometimes, if I felt support was needed, but not actually being sought from me, or anyone else.....

Most of the time I'm self-contained and my needs are relatively modest so I'm less likely to spend time considering what someone could do for me.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-23-2014, 05:33 PM

I'm glad to hear that answer. I wasn't going to ask, but I got an extension on my lottery ticket redemption period. I just need the money wired to me by tomorrow at 5:00 PM [[US-EST). If you start now, you should have no problem with making the arrangements. Let me know when you're ready and I'll get you the numbers for my off-shore bank account and you can start the wire transfer.

We're gonna be rich!!!!!

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-23-2014, 05:43 PM

I'd love to help...but I have a growing fear that someone has hacked into this forum, and is posting comments using my member name.

I have absolutely no recollection of creating post # 1719....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-23-2014, 08:38 PM

You're no fun... Well, if you pass the offer on to some other sucker - I mean friend, then perhaps I can share the good fortune with him or her.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 04:52 AM

You're beginning to sound so much like Arr&bee, it's intriguing...

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 01:28 PM

Speaking of whom, I wonder when he'll get another furlough and pop up around here again?

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 03:01 PM

Does ADX Florence permit furloughs?

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 04:02 PM

Kind of. For one hour per day with heavy security. It's nothing that a little hooch can't make better, though.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 04:06 PM

Perhaps we should all get together and put on a little cabaret offering for Arr&bee and the rest of the 'clientele' there........

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 04:08 PM

As long as my spot in the chorus line is closest to the exit...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 04:35 PM

Oh, no good looking to you to be the star attraction, then....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 04:38 PM

Nope. And not a willing hostage, either...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 04:44 PM

Looks like they will just have to make their own entertainment.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 05:10 PM

They can do a glitzy production of "Jailhouse Rock". I wonder who'll play Elvis?

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-24-2014, 05:27 PM

Whoever it is, if there is an announcement that 'Elvis has left the building', all hell will break out, too.....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-24-2014, 07:07 PM

I'm sure they'll find him in the ghetto...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-25-2014, 03:20 AM

How about Las Vegas? There must be some people there crying "VIva!", following previous incarceration...

**Jerry Oz** · 07-25-2014, 02:24 PM

Let's hope. When he's apprehended, the arresting officer will undoubtedly call the warden to see how he wants to disposition his case. I'm pretty sure that the warden will ask him to return to sender.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-25-2014, 02:35 PM

He ain't nothing but a hound dog....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-25-2014, 02:40 PM

And he should have kept a lower profile after he escaped. I know that Vegas is know as "Sin City", but there are a lot of suspicious minds there.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-26-2014, 04:56 AM

....who are convinced that the gambling machines have been customised to prevent them ever being a winner.....

**Jerry Oz** · 07-26-2014, 12:45 PM

In my experience, they're convinced that the next pull of the slot machine arm is going to win because they were this close one day last week. "Lost Wages", Nevada, indeed. I've no problem with going to a casino because I only take the money that I'm willing to lose. If I bet and lose $150 and I'm there for six or seven hours, that's fine because I would have to spend that on a concert ticket with a good view and I'd take an similar level of risk to think that I'd enjoy the show. And the show might only last a couple of hours.

Now, if I'm betting the baby's milk and diaper money, that's a different story...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-26-2014, 02:52 PM

If you visit the casino with that way of thinking, and Mrs Oz is also in there, mentally calculating [[or maybe even verbally) how much money the casino is making..while I'm putting my stake back in my left pocket every time I win, and only gambling with the winnings I have in my right pocket......then we'd be thrown out in no time......

**Jerry Oz** · 07-26-2014, 03:52 PM

I've been to casinos three times in my life. One visit I took $100 and came home with $90 after about three hours. Another visit saw me lose $75 [[all that I took) in less than an hour. The third visit saw all $100 disappear within an hour but I borrowed $20 from my brother-in-law and went home with a net $150 seven hours later [[at 7:00 AM). All in all, I broke even.

I never went with the idea that "tonight's my lucky night" or that I would somehow leave a millionaire. I went to have fun and to swear a little at how close I was to having a lucky night or leaving as a millionaire, only to lose on that last hand. I can easily see how people become addicted, but if I supposed for a minute that I should bet next month's mortgage payment, Mrs. Oz would gladly pack my bags and tape onto them a bus ticket to anywhere but home.

We have had a casino in my home town for the last year and a half and although I always figured that I'd visit one day, I haven't had the compulsion or energy to travel 20 minutes to do it. It's just not my thing, I guess...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-26-2014, 04:17 PM

Not mine, either. I just bought three Lotto tickets, but it's been the best part of a year since I last did that. I look upon it as a contribution to charity.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-26-2014, 04:25 PM

The lottery is a funny thing. People play it, not because they expect their numbers to hit when they do, but because they're afraid that they will come out when they don't. Nobody wants to open the paper to find out that the numbers they played faithfully for thirty years finally came out on the day they got to the store too late to play.

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-26-2014, 04:30 PM

I never check the winning numbers when I've not bought a ticket. That way, I don't start worrying about coincidences which never actually happened.

**Jerry Oz** · 07-26-2014, 11:14 PM

I'm flying over to see you and 144man when I hit. What's on the agenda?

**144man** · 07-27-2014, 05:38 AM

When you hit, we'll talk

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-27-2014, 06:56 AM

After that, we SPEND.

But Mrs Oz has to give it the OK first.
[[and something now tells me the proposed trip was just cancelled....)

**Jerry Oz** · 07-27-2014, 07:19 PM

If I told her about it, her response would be to ask if my arms were going to be tired after flying that long distance... I'm pretty sure she would have me on the "do not fly" list, at least until she could take my leash off and replace it with a more modern tracking and behavior control device...

**westgrandboulevard** · 07-28-2014, 06:05 AM

LOL! Mrs Oz still goes out to work, now that you've finished your previous employment?

Or are you seeing more of each other, these days?

**Jerry Oz** · 07-28-2014, 11:46 AM

She wasn't working before [[well, outside of home), so we're seeing a lot of each other these days. I'm ready to move on to the next thing, but she wants me to take six - yes, six - months off. I told her I'd take three. I need to work and I've been bored with "retired" life for over a month now. The opportunity that I want may still be there after three but I'm pretty sure it's going to be gone forever by November.