Musician's Jokes

I used to love the Muppets show, when the band would start telling musician's jokes. My high school band has had 2 reunions in the last 4 years. On their site I found a good musician's joke. Remember I played the trombone in the Lynn Band from 1955 - 1960, and then I joined the Musician's Union and ran a big band until 1975. Here it is.

What is the difference between a dead trombone player lying in the road and a dead squirrel lying in the road???????????

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The squirrel was probably going to a gig.

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Feel free to add any other musician's jokes

I think we all know the answer to


Do you know the way to San Jose?



edafan

A guy leaves his accordion on the back seat of his locked car. When he returns to the car, there is a broken window and TWO accordions on the back seat,

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ralpht

A guy leaves his accordion on the back seat of his locked car. When he returns to the car, there is a broken window and TWO accordions on the back seat,

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very good Ralphie

Not a Joke
one of my fellow musicians in
Big Band Revival a group we had from 1965 to 1980
just passed away.
Our lead tenor sax man Lin Ayer.

I wanted to post it here in this forum where a lot of musicians hang out.

edafan

I heard this as both a lawyer joke and a drummer joke:

Question: What do you call a dozen rock drummers at the bottom of a swimming pool?
Answer: A good start.

And this one is an adult joke:

A man went to a tattoo parlor and advised the proprietor that he was a huge Beatles fan and wanted a tattoo of John Lennon on his right thigh and Paul McCartney on his left thigh.

"Hope you don't mind that I'm flying commando," the customer said.

"Not a problem, friend," the tattooist responded, and the man pulled his pants down and sat in a chair in the shop. The artist pulled out a couple of photos for reference, told the man to relax and he began working.

About three hours later, he was done. When the man looked at the illustrations permanently inked into his skin, he was very upset.

"What is this?" he asked angrily. "Those are awful! I'm not paying for this!"

An argument ensued and they decided that they'd find a third party to grade the work and if it was agreed that it was sufficient, the man would pay for the job. They walked outside the shop and couldn't find anyone except for a wino sleeping happily in the gutter. They promised him a bottle of Wild Irish Rose if he could be their judge and he eagerly agreed to do it.

After they walked back to the shop, the three walked into a back room and customer dropped his pants to display the tattoos. The tattooist asked the wino if he recognized John Lennon and Paul McCartney. The wino looked back and forth and had a hard time remembering what Paul and John looked like, so the tattooist provided a photo of the Beatles to him.

"Oh, that's right! I remember the Beatles, now. Well, I don't know if that looks like John and Paul," he finally said. "But the smelly hairy guy with the big nose between them looks just like Ringo Starr!"