Can your lawyer actually write?
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Can your lawyer actually write?
From my understanding, Mikey can't write yet [[cute little tyke), but he can draw very well. When he's not eating the crayons, he's drawing up the papers with them.
".and who have you drawn today, Mikey?"
"This one's my Mom..... aaaaaand....this. one. is.my. Dad".
Clearly destined to be a divorce lawyer.
"But, Mikey... In your picture, who's the man hiding in the bushes with a bottle of hooch in one hand as he's pulling money from the pocket of the sleeping cop?"
"Mom. says. she. is .sure. he. is my. real. Dad......."
And now, the truth is known. Not an opportunist. Not a crooked politician. Not a bootlegger. Just a man doing everything he can to make sure his bastard son/lawyer has a bright future. So many facets in that diamond...
"Perhaps time's definition of coal is the diamond..." - Kahlil Gibran
From that viewpoint, perhaps we should invest heavily in lumps of coal, knowing that in a million years, they'll be worth a fortune. And is that your way of suggesting that we should put money into arr&bee's "projects"?
It's my way of suggesting the approximate length of time it will take for Arr&bee's projects to yield any gains.
Sounds like the mutual funds in which I invested my retirement money.
You'll need to be really old to start receiving your retirement income. Any earlier, and the shock could kill you.
From my seat, retirement is overrated.
YOU TWO ARE FUNNY,I GOT DIAMONDS JERRY IF YOU NEED ONE I FOUND ONE LEFT OVER FROM THE BOOR WARS...[THOSES BOORS WILL FIGHT OVER ANYTHING]ANYHOW THEY DROPPED ONE AND MY COMRADS CAME ACROSS IT JUST THINK OF HOW HAPPY THE MRS WILL BE WHEN YOU GIVE HER THIS ROCK...[it's ingraved too...made in korea]I'M GONNA LET YOU HAVE IT FOR ONLY...299%ABOVE FACTORY INVOICE...I JUST LOVE MAKIN FOLKS HAPPY.
I can get a post-dated check to you as soon as you can get me a stamped, self-addressed envelope. Although I'd prefer to deliver it in person. Hopefully you can send me a few hundred bucks so I can drive to where you are. Hate to lose it in the mail and need more envelopes...
Please send me an aeroplane ticket and expenses so I can get this stamped addressed envelope to Jerry as soon as possible if not sooner.
Did someone just fire a starting pistol?
Well, it looks to me like this business arrangement is off to a great start, so a starting pistol would be perfect! As soon as arr&bee sends 144man the envelope, the ticket, and itinerary, he can fly here and I'll get the check to him. I've post dated it to November 19, 2015, by which time I should have deposited at least the $35 necessary to cover it. If not, I'll let you know to wait another few weeks before attempting to cash it.
It's no wonder the National Debt is so worryingly high.
You're right. The government needs to discuss paying bills with post-dated checks instead of constantly borrowing money. It works for me.
Not if they did it for welfare payments and tax refunds:[[
They could balance the budgets if they issued each tax refund for a few cents more than what is due and then seize it when clueless filers try to cash the check. They could get them for trying to defraud the government and waive the jail time if they didn't insist on getting the refunds in the correct amount.
My mind just works that way, I wonder why the Internal Revenue Service has responded to my unsolicited e-mails demanding to run the agency?
Hey jerry don't worry,i'll have one of my people ride to where you are on his moped..[just look for the guy dressed as the joker]and drop off those tickets,not don't worry about the plane[such as it is]it ain't first class but it will get you there[i hope]don't worry about the tape on the wings it's for wind resistance[yeah that's it]and the plastic covering the windows are for rain protection and the pilot is first rate he flew with the wright brothers so he's been around,so if you make it-opps-err-ahem-hehe..when you make it we'll talk.
How much would it cost Jerry if he decided to sit inside the plane?
Wait... That plane actually has seats?!
There may also be a padded cell.
I have a feeling the passengers need as much padding on that thing as they can get. Maybe I'll just pass on delivering it in person...
This 'personal' thing can be very overrated.
Not when somebody else is signing the check; well, in my opinion, anyway...
JERRY,JERRY WOULD I PUT YOU IN HARM'S WAY?OF COURSE THE PLANE IS SAFE..[that little condem notice from the FAA is just a small misunderstanding]I MEAN THEY TRY TO REGULATE EVERY LITTLE THING,I MEAN MAYBE THE LANDING GEAR IS A LITTLE RUSTED WE GOT OIL,AND THAT RUMOUR ABOUT THE PILOT BEING PAST THE LEGAL AGE LIMIT TO FLY POPPYCOCK..[WHEN HE'S ON HIS MEDS AND TAKING HIS GLACOMA PILLS HE'S AS GOOD AS IT GETS DON'T WORRY JERRY YOU'LL BE FINE.
I didn't know the Wright Brothers were still working...
I'm cool with flying. I was late for a doctor's appointment yesterday and had to fly just to get there on time.
And today, my arms are still tired.
Ha! And so now you're working as a stork, delivering babies...?
At your age you should know that storks don't deliver babies. They're found under gooseberry bushes.
Ewww... Then what in the world did I bring back from the cabbage patch?
A cabbage patch doll? I suppose you're going to tell me it had a birth certificate.
Well, I heard that babies came from cabbage patches. Now, apparently, they're found under gooseberry bushes. I brought something back that's climbing all over the apartment while drinking my milk and smelling like poop and it apparently is not a baby.
And it sure as heck ain't cabbage, either.
You need a cabbage patch baby?i got em[ain't they cute]imagine the look on the mrs when you give her this little cutie..and only 700%above factory invoice..plus shipping.
It's the '700% above factory invoice plus shipping' which leads me to imagine the look on Mrs Oz's face - not what is being presented....
Umm... The last time I told her that I had a baby led to one of the worst discussions I've ever had. For some reason, things didn't even settle down after the blood test proved it wasn't mine.
Go figure. If it was mine, she's ticked off. I thought that she'd be tickled pink when she found out that it wasn't. Women...
Again, it's the process involved, not necessarily the final result, which causes the real trouble.