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I become disappointed at the regularity of people telling me about their adult children, from whom they receive no word..often not even at Christmas. I must say that I do find myself thinking "well, maybe there are reasons for this on both sides". It still seems regrettable even if, for them, it is a fact of life to which they seem resigned.
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Sometimes life gets in the way of life. Priorities shift and some things seem less urgent. We may always be able to go see our folks, but the game will only be on television once, so we choose to watch the game with friends. Only we won't always be able to see the folks and the chest of missed opportunities begins to fill. When they're gone, we have to deal with whatever rationalization makes us feel good for causing their heartache.
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It seems that the incidence of rationalisation increases as one ages. I think it is just our way of getting by.
As you quite rightly say, life gets in the way. I often stop and find myself thinking back about things I cannot alter, about why 'this' or 'that' had to be, yet knowing full well the answers. I guess it is often pure self-centred sentiment which often prevents us from living only for the day, and from making the most of it.
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Well, the cat's in the cradle... Dwelling on it serves zero benefit, so learn to accept it and continue to move forward. Every second spent worrying about yesterday is a waste because you lived through it already.
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OK in theory. If only it were that easy to put into practice!
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Hear, hear! Practice overrides theory....particularly when one is accustoming themself to be among the elder generation in a family, and in a country.
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If I permitted myself more than a minute or so to think about mistakes I made 30 years ago, I'd be clinically depressed. Literally. I give in to it from time to time but fortunately, I move on quickly. It's best to revisit them to make sure you learned from them without thinking about how much better things would be if you knew then what you now know. You didn't. Try not to kick yourself too hard or you might hurt yourself.
And, yes, it is easier to maintain that viewpoint than it is to practice it. I've made so many regrettable errors in my life that I could spend all of my day reflecting on them.
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It's not any mistakes I have made which can lead me to become preoccupied, [[as I don't dwell on those) it's the other factors of life in general over which we have no control, which can cause some reflection - and which is not necessarily negative in nature.
These can be triggered by a recurrence, quite often happening in someone else's life. I imagine it is something in a current activity or experience which causes memories from our own life, many years ago, to emerge from the subconscious...and which is something that can only happen when one is of a certain age.
Things which cannot be altered can also be quite stubbornly resistant to being disregarded. It could well be a sign that they were not fully addressed at the time.
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I guess. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to remember our best days in HD? If I have a regret, it's that I failed to remember the small things like conversations, locations, dates, time of day, etc. I wish I had taken mental photographs instead of hastily-scribed Post-It notes of things that I remember happening, but don't quite remember.
At this point, I barely remember what happened yesterday without a lot of thought, let alone what happened 30 years ago.
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It may be that they are buried, more than you know. If so, with the passing of time they could, in time, start to return to you. When both my grandmothers died, I remembered more clearly what they had said. It happened again when my Dad died and, more latterly, when my Mum died. It's almost as if a person's physical presence can cause us to suppress all manner of things.
My own memories can be quite vivid, but also very fragmented - snapshots, if you will, and so can start to crowd my mind a bit. I find I then have a need to get them in some sort of mental order, as in "Get out of my head!" moments....
In other words, I guess I don't like to feel that 'things just happen to me' - !
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None of us does. As for me, what's too painful to remember, I simply choose to forget. So it's the laughter that I will remember...
<Oops.> I did that one already, didn't I?
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Yes, you did. And I still think Gladys Knight told it best for you, than did Barbra Streisand....
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I'm a huge fan of the Manhattans and Gerald Alston did a version that will always be my favorite. A beautiful song that can be interpreted well by many wonderful people.
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I wish I'd written it. The income stream must have more closely resembled a tsunami.
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RIP Marvin Hamlisch. A storied career that left many great songs and art least one true masterpiece.
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One masterpiece is one more than almost everyone else will leave, when the time comes...
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It'd be nice to believe that we all did at least one great thing in our lives.
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Living a decent life, and making it a little better for our contemporaries, is as much as most of us will accomplish..and that's certainly enough. But yes, something notable would add real distinction...
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Better or worse. You can impact people in several ways that might be considered "great". Eli Whitney created the cotton gin and made cotton a sustainable crop for the American South. Many people in the South were grateful and thought of Eli as an economy-saving genius. The slaves in the American South? Not so much positive thought.
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True. Depends on whether you can use something, or not. It could be a blessing, or a curse.
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Hitler's role in history is as a villain. Had Germany won the war, it's possible that he'd be generally viewed differently, at least in Germany. Just as Stalin and Mao are the stars of their respective nations' history books. Of course, the things that we feel make living in Western society wonderful also paint our nations as galvanizing points of emphasis for extremists in the East.
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The world has become smaller and people travel more. I do find myself feeling perhaps insular, but also wondering if sometimes we might generally be better off if more of us kept to our own countries, and respected the customs of other countries, even if we didn't agree with them. Now everyone and everything becomes so 'involved'.....although, of course, the USA has always been the biggest peacemaker in the world [[but, as you say, many would disagree with that......)
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I can foresee a day when the Western nations are united in a manner like the EU, with shared defense, economy, and [[to an extent) government. Then the wall will go up and it will be much harder for people to travel to and fro. That'll happen soon after the first use of a nuke by terrorists. The world has become too small and folks are looking over their neighbors' fences and forming judgments about what they see. Sometimes it's best to have space.
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If ever there were to be a concerted effort to destroy and disable our electricity pylons, or our internet service, we are in real trouble....
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It's been shown that electrical plants can be shut down remotely [[physically destroyed, actually). I don't think power companies want to fit the bill to prevent it and governments are busy wasting their money elsewhere.
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It just proves that we all have destructive thoughts, if we're thinking about what terrorists may be thinking...
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You have to do that these days. The terrorists are only limited by their lack of imagination. With so many "freedoms" in our society, anyone can buy a gun and attack a crowded downtown street. They'll learn. And then we will too.
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They're as clever as we are, sometimes more so, and can have the upper hand for a while.
In our minds, we represent good, they represent bad. We have always to stay ahead....
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If we had the mindset of the worst of them [[and which they think of us), we could use the strongest of our weapons to obliterate their bases of operation. It would kill tens of thousands, so "the Great Satan" has curious patience with its enemies. Somehow, this point escapes many of them. Perhaps they are afraid that the devil is whispering into their ears under the guise of God.
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What people will do in the name of their God.....:confused:
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I'm not one to talk... I encourage everybody to seek his own salvation. But at least understand the basis for that belief. To twist religion the way that many do is unfathomable. I wonder why anyone can believe in a god of hatred.
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I could understand that but, in their eyes, to kill others and sometimes also themselves in a brutal fashion, is all done for a God of love. If both I and they wait long enough, we are going to die, anyway.....and then we will find out...so there should be no rush, and certainly not on their terms.
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Yeah. And to 'convert' someone at gunpoint seems to be an odd concept. I wonder if crossing your fingers while pledging your new faith is something that your new fellowship would frown on?
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All of us currently alive were once born and,therefore, must one day die, simply as a rule of nature. Having a belief seems to have little if anything to do with that. That knowledge must be more sound than that of someone who also believes themself destined for divine supremacy. That said, yes, I would feel far more assured in the face of that if I also were holding a gun.....
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Why are we afraid of death? It would seem that there's nothing really to fear other than not finding out who's going to win the game next week or who will be voted out on 'Big Brother'. I have a belief in afterlife but I have no strong desire to start it anytime soon. I neither want the gun not want to see its barrel pointed in my direction. It strikes me curious to think that the Game often ends for Player #1 right when he thinks there's a chance to win it.
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When my father died, there was a half-read book on his bedside table. It really upset me at the time that he never found out the ending.
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Knowing your humour, 144man, I can't be absolutely sure if you're being serious..but in case you are...
Perhaps your father wasn't reading it for the first time...? If it was a previously read, favourite book, which gave him repeated reassurance and pleasure [[for example, the way some people read The Bible a lot), he then passed away at peace.
That may not be the case, and you may very well be right, but it's just a thought....:)
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This time I was being serious. It was a library book, but as it was a Western the ending was probably predictable. Things uncompleted bother me. I often used to work late rather than leave a task unfinished.
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Like me, then. If some task turns into a long haul, and has to be tackled in sections, I start to worry that I will lose interest. Many things are best tackled and also completed in short bursts, if at all possible.
We're naturals for the Word Association thread...hovering, in case just one more comes in......except, tonight, I will make a change of habit.... so, g'night....!
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Yes, it's half past pumpkin-time, so g'night, wgb.